Tuesday, March 8, 2011

a little variety

i figured i'd give a little variety.
first a few jokes.
i came up with this one myself. it's a little dark.
"guys i'm kinda sad right now.."
"what happened dude?"
"well last night my dog died"
"aww man that sucks"
"yeah, it was horrible... she kept trying to bite me and kept trying to jump out of the hole, but after i hit her with the shovel a few times she stopped struggling."

it's all about the delivery with this joke, gotta be convincing when you start.
and a good one to follow this one up with
"wanna here a joke about my cat?"
"sure"
"it's dead...just kitten!"

a random interesting fact.
strippers make less money the closer they get to their period. this is because women are biologically programmed to act sexier and release more pheromones when she is most fertile (aprox. 2 weeks after her period). women don't realize they do this, it's subconscious. so if you ladies ever feel like there is a certain time of the month you always get hit on more, it's because there is ;)

and finally a quote

"Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves."-Einstein
i'm a fan of his.
btw feel free to suggest things that you would like to see more or less of.

37 comments:

  1. i read dead kitten and wet my chair.......
    great read

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  2. Pretty funny man! I'll be back for sure

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  3. nooo! they were.............. i cant say it :(

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  4. haha interesting fact will get used around at work, thanks

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  5. bahaha thats fucking histericle mate

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  6. kitten one made me laugh a bit
    +follow

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  7. That's why when I kiss my girlfriend, it's the only Thing I do at the moment

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  8. Haha! Dark jokes, I like them!

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  9. I think I've subconsciously noticed the period thing, from living with my girlfriend.

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  10. Thinking about menstruating strippers makes me....ummm....

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  11. Heh, that was pretty cute. Nice facts and jokes man.

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  12. huh, interesting stuff. learn something new every day :)

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  13. That joke is solid. Gotta love jokes that require good delivery. Keep up the good work.

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  14. please use another color setup, the dark theme looks too generic, other than that keep up the funny posts!

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  15. That's an awesome Einstein quote, I guess he was quite the lady's man.

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  16. makes sense about the strippers. Lulzy Einstein quotes ftw

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  17. lol what a hilarious quote... keep it up

    followed!...

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